Saturday, March 20, 2010

This is my life

I'm still having trouble being able to comment on blogs, so I apologize for my silence.  I'm still reading, I promise!

I bought a Wii last weekend.  I wanted something that would allow me to exercise without having to go to the gym, because I really hate going to the gym at this point and never bothered to go any more.  I also wanted something that would allow our family to do things together without having to play regular video games.  And so far it's been a lot of fun!!  We've only had the chance to play a few times, but we've really enjoyed it!  We've boxed, we've golfed, we've played tennis, and last night Master and I played a little baseball.  I'm not very good at this point, but it's still pretty fun!

Work is going pretty well.  We had a new girl, Lizzy, start about a month ago as part of our team.  She's kind of replacing Mari, although some of the responsiblities have shifted a little.  Lizzy was brought on as a contract employee because one of the big programs that we offer only goes through the end of this year.  She'll be around at least a few months after that to help wrap up everything.  So far she's been a great addition, and I'm secretly hoping that they're able to find a permanent spot for her after her contract is up.  Not only is she good to work with, but she's also originally from England, so she's fun to listen to!

I'm still not sure what to say about my marriage.  I thought things were getting better, but then just in this past week, I could feel Master pulling away again, like before.  I asked him about it and he said he still wasn't happy.  We had a whole big fight/discussion/whatever about our relationship.  The thing I keep getting upset about is that he'll talk about things that he's not happy about, but he's not doing anything to change them.  I can't fix everything on my own!  I still don't understand how I'm supposed to submit to him when he doesn't take charge except when it suits his purpose or when it's convenient.  I'm doing my best to submit, to not bother about things that aren't going to change, whatever I can do to make him happy and make this work.  I just don't know what else to do.  I want my marriage to work.  Master and I still love each other, we still like each other, we still care about each other, it just seems crazy for us to not be able to make this work!

We agreed to keep trying.  Master said he's really going to try to REALLY take charge this time.  He knows that he's not consistent about it.  I guess that's part of what frustrates me is that he knows he's not doing what he says he'll do and what I need him to do, but he's still willing to call it quits when he's in the position to change things!  Ugh.  I just want to be happy and I thought we were heading in the right direction, and now I feel like I'm back to square one.  I'm frustrated and tired, but more than anything I'm scared.  I'm so scared.

Everything in my life is going well, why can't this?

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Monday, March 15, 2010

I did this

I finished my second knitting project yesterday, a scarf for my mom.  She knows I made something for her, but doesn't know what it is or anything.  I can't wait for her to see it!

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Thursday, March 04, 2010

This is where I spend my time now

My friends... I think I've become a little bit obsessed. You know what I spend most of my time either thinking about or doing? Knitting. Seriously. You know the funny thing is that when I started my knitting class (which ended this past Saturday), I was the worst one in the class. I left that first class feeling kind of discouraged, really. But I practiced and practiced. And practiced. And after a few days I stopped by to see the instructor because I couldn't purl right and I wanted to be able to practice that the right way before our next class. And after our four Saturdays (2 hours each time), I felt like I was doing pretty well! In the end, I think the fact that I've knitted at least a little almost every day since I started has really helped my case.

So, I finished my first project, which was just a fairly simple hat. It turned out even better than I thought it would and I'm really quite proud of it! (This is not a good picture of me, but it shows off my hat!)


I stopped by the yarn store this past Tuesday to see my instructor (even though the class is finished, she says we can stop by and she'll help if it's not busy) and she helped me a little with the seam in the back. Not that you can even see it in this picture. But at least now I know how to do it so the seam isn't showing when the cuff is folded up.
Speaking of my knitting class and my teacher, I just want to say how much I enjoyed the class and how I love my teacher! There were only six of us in the class (it's kept small on purpose) and in addition to the teacher, Kathy, there was another lady, Alison, who helped out. So we could get really individual attention on just about everything we did. I also like that Kathy made the point that we could really create our own stuff; we don't have to follow a pattern on everything. Or we could take what we like from a pattern and change it to fit how we want it to be. I really love that store and the people who work there. They offer other classes, so once I get a little more "basic" knitting under my belt, I'll probably be taking other things from there. It's so fun!
I've already started my next project - a scarf for my mom. I asked Mom if she'd be a little bit of a guinea pig for me, so I could make stuff and send it to her and not worry about it being exactly perfect. Of course, because my mom loves me and because she's awesome, she agreed to do so! I wanted to practice moss stitch and seed stitch, so I'm doing a scarf with that stitching in it, along with some regular garter stitch thrown in. Here's a picture from when I first started it:


I had the garter base and had just started the moss stitch, but I ended up tearing all of this out because I decided I wanted it to be wider. This picture doesn't really do it justice, but I really love this yarn. I want to live in this yarn. The colours are just beautiful! I'll be taking a picture of the scarf when I'm finished, so maybe that will show the colours better.

So this is definitely my new hobby and why I'll probably be spending time on that instead of blogging. Not that I've been so talkative lately anway. What are all of you spending your time on? :)

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