What the heck?
I've got something sexual on the brain. A couple things have happened in my head over the last few days that have got me pondering.
First, a few days ago I had a dream. I won't bother going into details, partly because I don't even completely remember them. You know how it is with dreams. But in the dream I was somewhere (I'm not sure where) with a group of people that I knew. A man walked in who was threatening us with violence (although I don't remember now what he wanted). Everyone else was really scared. I was kind of scared, but I literally threw myself at him. Like, sucking on his tongue and rubbing myself up against him, threw myself at him. After hot sex, it was as if we instantly fell into a relationship, with a D/s flavor. We went out to eat and he ordered for me without even asking what I wanted. Throughout my entire dream, he was very much in charge and in control. And I found him to be incredibly sexy, despite the fact that he wasn't really all that physically attractive.
The second thing happened today, but first I need to give a little background. This is a big confession for me because this is something I'm NOT proud of. XM is the only person I've ever told about this occurance. Several years ago, when I was in my mid-20's, Mom, Brother, and I went to visit some extended family, people we don't get to see very often (one of my dad's cousins and her family). The last night there, I was alone at one point with the cousin's husband and we ended up fooling around a bit. Just kissing and a little groping, all over in about 15 minutes. I should include the fact that he's a physically big man (6' 6) and has a rather commanding personality (although I think he can be a big softy at times too).
Anyway, I spoke with this man by phone today regarding something about my granddad's estate. I haven't seen or spoken to this man since that visit several years ago. We had a really nice conversation, nothing weird or awkward. But I found that I was all revved up and tingly after talking to him. And THAT is making me feel weird and awkward.
So this all has got me thinking. I must have a "type" of man that I am attracted to. I guess that isn't a surprise, but it makes me wonder if it's a bigger deal to me than I realized. It's obviously invaded my subconscious. It also makes me wonder if I want a man who's a little older than what I would normally look for.
What do you guys think?